Do The Things You Like

Ever find yourself never actually using or doing the things you like, with the mindset that you’re saving it for later? I know that many of us humans do the opposite, just binging the things we like and running from one thing we like to the next. But I must not be alone in charting a different course, one where you’re eternally saving the best for later. I’ve been reflecting on these tendencies and it has occurred to me that there’s an easily accessible way to make me—and others around me—happier. Now bear with me here, this is going to sound crazy…but we could try, I don’t know, actually engaging with things or activities that we like? 

Let me explain my tendencies a bit further, as that will help clarify the situation and possibly make it more relatable. I’ve worked from home for about eight years now. I’m an introvert who isn’t the biggest fan of going out with other groups of people. As such, I am always wearing my crappiest clothes around the house, simply throwing on a dress shirt for calls when needed, and then going back to a 15 year-old dilapidated t-shirt. But it’s not just any old t-shirt; it’s a giveaway for a brand I don’t even like.

On the surface, this might not seem like much of an issue. It makes sense to use our clothing before throwing it out, and to save special things for going out. While that may be true, there is such a thing as going too far. I often end up stumbling into new t-shirts, sometimes through giveaways but sometimes just via purchasing decisions that I make in the moment and then later regret. So, what happens is I’m always wearing shirts I don’t like, with the mindset that I’ll save the nice shirts, the ones that fit me well and feel good, for when the older ones wear out. In other words, I’m giving myself some of that sweet sweet delayed gratification. But because I keep amassing new t-shirts that I don’t like, I feel compelled to wear those out too. Ultimately I never end up getting to the shirts I like, and I end up wearing clothes around the house that I actively dislike. I never end up using the shirts that I like.

This type of tendency doesn’t always involve not using something; it also might involve not wanting to break something. I have some drink glasses that I really like, but I only have two of them and they are made of glass. As I really don’t want to accidentally break one or both, I almost never end up using them. I’ll save them for a special occasion or for when the other glasses break. Same thing with another type of glasses (the ones that you put on your face); I have a pair I especially like, but they are the only ones with no scratches on the lens, so I almost never end up wearing them since I want to keep them in good condition. Again, I never end up using the glasses that I like.

I’m not saying that there isn’t some value in taking care of things, of using things up completely before moving on, or in simply delaying gratification for a later reward. In fact each one of those can be useful! But like so many things in life, we can take this to an extreme. And the extremes can mean that you’re missing out for no good reason. So, my message to you in this short blog is, well, enjoy the thing! Whatever it is that you’re constantly putting off or holding back on, ask yourself if it’s a sensible restraint—like the reasons mentioned in this paragraph—or if it’s something that is just a wee bit extreme. Make sure to examine your choices, and choose wisely. The downsides of not doing this aren’t just that you might get hit by a bus tomorrow and thus miss your opportunity altogether—although that is something that could happen—but that you run the risk of constantly making yourself just a little bit less happy. Seeing that ugly shirt in the mirror every time you go in the bathroom for 15 years, drinking from the glass that doesn’t pour liquid well…that shit can add up, you know? How about using the glasses that regularly slide off your face for fear of damaging the pair that fit well? How many seconds or minutes or hours or full days are you voluntarily inviting a small amount of suffering from your ill-fitting glasses? 

I should make it clear here that I’m not suggesting you should just do whatever you like without giving thought to the consequences, or how they might affect others. Or that you should never delay gratification, or that you should never save something special for a special time in your life. No, this post refers to the more mundane things that we choose not to use or do, things that are run-of-the-mill ordinary life stuff that could make our day-to-day more enjoyable. If you found any of these examples relatable, take a moment to examine your own tendencies in case there might be opportunities for productive change. You’ll thank yourself when you’re finally enjoying a cool beverage on a hot day in the gosh darn glass that you’ve always owned and loved but never used.